


Paper Wings

by typeBfan



Category: Artemis Fowl - Eoin Colfer
Genre: Cuddlefic, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Pre-ship, h/c
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-14
Updated: 2012-05-14
Packaged: 2017-11-05 08:52:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/404551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/typeBfan/pseuds/typeBfan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>To the LEP emotions are a weakness and expressing them is tantamount to a death-wish. Knowing this, Holly tries to hide her pain and grief by bottling it up inside; Trouble, however, turns out to be more perceptive than she thought... H/T, post-TAC.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Paper Wings

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Not mine, Eoin Colfer's
> 
> Warnings: contains some AF: The Atlantis Complex spoilers, rated T for kissing and some exam-stress-induced humour!
> 
> This is a oneshot inspired by the song Paper Wings from Rise Against. I tried to tie up a lot of loose ends from AF: The Atlantis Complex in here because I had some...issues with Trouble's characterisation.

After two hours of pacing in a dimly lit briefing room, Commander Trouble Kelp is momentarily blinded by the artificial glare of the LEP infirmary's overhead lighting. The adrenaline surging in his veins allows Trouble to ignore the assault on his senses but every muscle in his body is tense with pent up energy.

 _I'm going to deck the next fairy to say_ Commander Kelp _,_ the elf mentally growled, blinking sunspots from his vision. Internal Affairs had tried to drag him over the coals again for the LEP's handling of the evacuation of Atlantis and the involvement of that famously insufferable Irish mud boy. Trouble's ability to play the controlled and detached superior officer had been tested to the limit by their groundless accusations and finger pointing. He'd managed to rein his temper in during the inquisition but the mental effort left him ridiculously quick to anger afterwards; a fact that became all too clear when he lost his composure with Fowl and his AWOL fairies.

"Can I help you?" a warm voice asked, drawing Trouble's attention to the sprite at his elbow. The fairy slid a digipen into its slot on her palm pilot without breaking eye contact, stowing the device in a pocket emblazoned with the crest of the Haven City Warlocks and Nurses Association.

"Yes, actually," he replied with a start. "I'm looking for ward..." Trouble automatically moved to pat down the pockets of his LEP issue jacket and cargo pants until he realised the crumpled napkin from Spud's Spud Emporium was still clenched in his fist. He hastily flattened it out to read the hospital room number he'd jotted down from Foaly's directions. "Ward 5-C."

"Certainly, Commander. Follow me."

"Oh, I don't want to interrupt your rounds. I'm sure I could find my way if you gave me directi-"

"You aren't interrupting anything," said the nurse with a wry smile. "I think the hospital administrators will be glad to let _you_ deal with our problem patient; hopefully you'll have more luck than the warlocks."

"That bad?"

The sprite nodded as she swiped her access card over the security panel beside a pneumatic door labelled 'Enforced Admissions'. Trouble hesitated slightly before stepping foot into the room; he didn't like what the official name of Ward 5 implied.

A gnome and an elf were lounging in the visitors' chairs by the receptionist's desk with their jackets and helmets in a pile on the linoleum covered floor.

"Vein, Rook?" Trouble frowned as he recognised the two retrieval officers. "What are you two doing here?"

The fairies sprang to their feet with equally embarrassed squeaks. "Sorry, Commander, sir."

"At ease," Trouble ordered with a sharp wave of his hand.

Ash Vein was the first to slump back into his chair with a heavy sigh. "Thanks, we've been here three hours-"

"Three hours! On whose orders?"

"Well…he said they were yours…"

"He? D'Arvit," Trouble swore, recognising yet another example of Foaly's trademark meddling. "That centaur is _not_ going to wheedle his way out of this one. What did he tell you?"

Vein winced at the Commander's tone. "Just that we had to stand watch on this ward until you got here."

"Okay. I want you two to go home and take tomorrow off. You'll both be paid overtime rates for the hours you've put in today _and_ the work you were rostered for tomorrow; the ingots will be coming out of Foaly's budget. Get some rest."

Trouble stepped forwards without waiting for a reply, signalling an end to the conversation as he added ' _Scrap Foaly's proposal to build a new prototype generation of gas screens'_ to his never-ending mental 'to do' list. He could have brought Foaly up on charges for impersonating a police officer but Trouble knew he'd have done the same thing if their roles were reversed.

"5-C is a private room," the nurse began to explain, interrupting Trouble's thoughts again. "If you follow that corridor by the receptionist's desk it'll be the third door on your left."

"Thank you." He tried to sound genuinely grateful but his fingers were cold and shaking; a sure sign of the mental and physical exhaustion he'd been fighting all day. Surely Turnball couldn't have known Trouble was pushing fifty-two hours without sleep when he'd initiated his breakout from maximum security.

 _Of course he did,_ whispered the paranoid and rebellious part of his subconscious.

"It's just the fatigue talking," he growled aloud, making his way down the brightly lit corridor to the door marked _Room C_.

The paranoia chuckled sounding exactly like Foaly gloating over his latest marvel of modern technology when it said: _You're talking back!_

"Shut up and get out of my head."

_Sure thing, I'll just pop out your ear and go inhabit some other-_

"Out!" he ordered, reflexively smacking himself over the head.

 _Ouch!_ the paranoia groaned but was otherwise silent.

"D'Arvit," Trouble swore, gingerly pressing the sore spot on the left side of his skull. He wasn't just exhausted, he was hallucinating! And the fact that he only had himself to blame made the whole damned situation worse. Living off caffeine pills, coffee and adrenaline for the past sixty-three hours was obviously beginning to wear away at his sanity. He'd have to take a nap, _soon_ \- after he'd dealt with this latest situation, of course.

Trouble took a moment to rest against the white-washed wall and calm himself. It wouldn't help matters any if he stormed in there and started making demands, dishing out ultimatums. This mission wasn't a job for _Commander_ Kelp; that part of his personality would have to take the backseat on this one.

"Hello?" he called once he'd managed to swallow the nervous lump in his throat. "Can I come in?"

Trouble paused for a moment, hoping for a response, before he pressed his right thumb to the gel scanner beside the door. It beeped once, confirming his identity and recording it on the central Visitors Access Log before popping the door open. He felt a warm brush of air as the seal released and realised the room's internal heating had been cranked right up.

"I'm going to come in," Trouble warned, toeing the door further open with his boot.

"Mhmm," came the quiet, non-committal response.

Trouble would have missed the sound completely if it wasn't for his exceptionally sensitive hearing and the wired state of his nerves. "Did that mean _'okay'_ or _'leave me alone before I punch you'_?" he queried, attempting to inject a little warmth into his tired voice.

"Would you leave if I said the latter?"

"No," he replied without hesitation. "But I might radio for back-up, just in case."

He expected some sort of response to his cocky statement but silence hung heavy on the air.

"Hey." He moved into the room, automatically pressing the door closed behind him. "You okay?"

The other elf stood before a backlit seaweed tank set into the far wall. Mud men would have called it a fish tank but most fairies objected to keeping any kind of animal as a pet; this aquarium only contained different species of aquatic plant life and the odd cluster of plankton that kept the glass clean.

"I'm fine, Commander."

"One, drop the rank – I'm not here on LEP business. Two, Foaly and Juliet told me what you've been through today so there's no way in hell I'm going to believe you're ' _fine_ '."

The elf spun to face him, her pale and bloody face livid. "Regulations state I should always address you as _Sir_ or _Commander_ , anything else would be deemed insubordination or inappropriate behaviour. Also, I _am_ fine and unless you want me to press the emergency call button you will drop the subject. Am I making myself clear, _Commander_ Kelp?"

Trouble knew exactly what she was trying to do; bait him into losing his temper so he'd shout at her and storm out. She'd used the same tactic before in the past – usually when his stress levels were through the roof – and he'd ranted like a criminally insane pixie.

"That isn't going to work this time, Holly," he sighed, rubbing tired eyes with his palms.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yes, you do."

"No, I-"

"Look. I've been up for over sixty hours and I'm _really_ in no fit state to be fighting with you all night. I'd probably collapse after a few hours and you'd find it impossible to convince the hospital to kick me out of the spare bed in this room; you'd be stuck with me until one of us was discharged."

Holly took a proper look at her superior. Trouble did actually look tired; there were dark circles under his purple eyes while twin spots of colour burned high on his cheeks, creating a stark contrast with the rest of his pale, washed out face. The last and most telling sign of just how exhausted the male elf felt was the way his ears were tilted back and flattened against his skull.

"Maybe you should sit down," she reluctantly admitted, unable to keep a note of concern from slipping into her voice. "Your ears are back, do you really feel that bad?"

He shot her his ' _would I look like this if I didn't feel like crap?'_ glare before perching on the edge of her hospital bed. Trouble noticed the sheets he sat on were already mussed and the pillows seemed to have been thrown at the door but he refrained from making a snarky comment about it.

"You didn't answer my question, Kelp," said Holly after a slight pause, hiding her concern with detached hostility. "Should I be calling for a warlock?"

"No, and lose the attitude. You don't look too good yourself, you know?"

"I'm fine," she insisted, splaying her arms for emphasis which caused a wince as she moved her bruised ribs.

"Did you actually let the warlocks see you?" Trouble demanded, catching the flash of pain in her expression.

Holly grimaced for a moment, looking decidedly guilty. "I didn't need them."

"R-i-i-ght," drawled Trouble, channelling his frustration into throwing himself backwards against the bed. "Tell me you at least let N°1 check you over?"

The awkward silence following his exasperated question was all the answer he needed.

"D'Arvit, Holly," he groaned, sitting up again with more than a little effort. "Come here."

She froze for a second in confused surprise. "Wait, what?"

"I said _come here_. My magic is nowhere near as strong as N°1's but I've had enough in-service training to search out any traces of Turnball's thrall. Where did he put the rune mark?"

"Trouble," she began, her voice quiet but determined. "Drop it."

"No, where did he put it?"

"I said-"

"Shut up, sit down. If it helps, _Captain_ , I'll make that an order."

She visibly hesitated, stuck between sticking to her guns or accepting Trouble's help.

"It's me or the warlocks," he warned, patting the sheets at his side. "Trust me, I'm not going to back down on this one."

"What makes you think _I_ will?"

Trouble paused to gather his thoughts and waning strength. "I'm not asking you to back down from anything. I'm worried about you; I want to make sure you're okay – physically, at least – before we go back to that great verbal standoff we were in the middle of. Neither of us will have to get down off our moral high horses; I'm just calling for a temporary timeout."

"Alright," Holly huffed, moving to perch on the bed, purposely avoiding the spot Trouble had patted; she had agreed but she was _not_ going to make it easy for him.

"So," Trouble began, sliding a few inches closer to her, "where did he put the rune mark?"

She glared at him for a long moment before reaching up to her neck to trace the small, circular scar. "He, uh, he stepped on my throat to hold me down. I remember what it felt like when the rune was being carved but my memory goes blank after that…"

"Right," he said, swallowing convulsively. "Has anyone touched it since?"

"No."

Trouble waited for Holly's hand to drop from her neck, for a sign that it was okay for him to touch the mark beneath her fingers, but her body stayed frozen in place.

"Holly?"

She blinked, startled by the sound of his voice so close to her.

"You okay?"

"Yeah," she mumbled distractedly, avoiding eye contact.

Trouble frowned, shuffling closer again until his right leg touched her left. He moved a cautious hand towards her, brushing the ruffled ends of her auburn hair aside. Holly shivered slightly when his fingers accidentally grazed the lobe of her ear but her hand didn't move from the side of her neck.

"May I?" he asked, unnerved by Holly's strange and distant behaviour.

A very slight nod was her only response as Trouble slipped two of his fingers under her hand. He grimaced as he felt the circle of pale, raised ridges etched just beneath Holly's left ear. Just tracing the mark made his stomach churn but he pushed the sickening sensation aside, focusing on calling forth his magic instead.

"I'm sorry about before," he murmured in an attempt to keep Holly focused and alert.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean the video-call we had when you were floating around in the Atlantic. Argon and his cronies advised me to insult the mud boy as much as possible- something about giving him an enemy to focus his paranoia on. You see, we managed to dig up some of his computer files after you warned us about the Complex and there were mentions of a 'mutual historical dislike' between us. I know I played the aggressive antagonist to the extreme and I'm sorry if my attitude upset you in any way….Holly?"

Her sudden chuckle made Trouble lose his concentration and he felt the small tendril of magic he'd been shaping into a probe snap back into his veins. "I thought you were channelling Commander Root."

"Maybe," he replied, taken aback by the nonchalance of her response.

Holly angled her face towards him, catching his eyes with hers. "I was starting to think you were really the same as the others."

It was Trouble's turn to say: "What?"

"You know, one of those egotistical retrieval jocks that'd rather go three rounds with a male bull troll than admit they were wrong."

"Oh, but I am one of those retrieval jocks. 'Gung ho' Gilly and all that."

"Gilly?" Holly asked, her head tilting further to the right as her eyes brightened with interest.

He let out a longsuffering sigh but kept his mouth firmly shut.

"Come on, what is that?"

"Mum."

"What?"

"My mum."

"Yes, I got _that_ ," Holly said, turning to face Trouble. She had to sit cross-legged beside him to do so, her left knee digging gently into his hip bone, but it was worth it to see her Commander's face as pink as Lili Frond's jumpsuit. "But what does 'Gilly' have to do with your mum?"

"Short for Gilian. My great-great-grandfather on mum's side was a water elf."

"Gilian?" she asked, almost to herself.

Trouble nodded, breaking eye contact to inspect the cover on his wrist computer.

"You?" Holly laughed, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "That's your name?"

"I'd appreciate it if you didn't share it 'round," he replied, sounding as though he was mentally cursing the ground his mother walked on.

"Isn't Gilian a-"

"Don't-"

"-girl's name?"

Trouble growled something inaudible and tried to look grumpy but the anger any mention of his birth name usually provoked was drowned by the warmth of Holly's friendly teasing. This was the dynamic they'd shared before Hybras and his promotion to acting Commander; the part of their friendship he missed the most.

"Alright, Gilly, your secret's safe with me."

" _Really_ ," he said in a tone of voice that dripped with the unspoken inflection of ' _I'm not at all convinced'_.

"Captain Holly Short, at your service." She gave him a jaunty approximation of the rigidly choreographed LEP salute.

"Well then, Captain," he returned, feeling a little less exhausted after their relaxed exchange. "It's about time you sat still and let me take a look at that scar."

The atmosphere in the room fizzed with tension again as Holly's shoulders hunched, the amused smile falling from her lips. She seemed to be curling inwards, away from Trouble and his piercing gaze.

"Hey." He caught her chin with his index finger so he could prop her eyes up to meet his. "Don't do that."

"Do what?" she breathed, her gaze focused on a point beside his left cheekbone.

"Shut down like that."

"Sorry, defence mechanism or whatever." She shrugged her shoulders noncommittally, turning her face away.

"Or whatever," he repeated bitterly. This was what the LEP could do to fairies; make them believe emotions were a weakness and expressing them was tantamount to a death wish. Now he could understand why elves – the most emotional fairy family of all – rarely chose to stay in recon or retrieval.

"Trouble," said Holly, startling him. "I'm tired; I think you should leave now."

He met her gaze and clenched his jaw so he didn't voice the ' _I'm not going anywhere'_ forming in his larynx. She did look tired and battered with scrapes and bruises marring her skin but the tiny spark of uncertainty in her mismatched eyes gave him the conviction to stay.

"No."

Holly jerked around sharply to face him. "Leave, I'd rather be treated by the warlocks."

"No."

"Would you stop that?" she growled, sliding off the bed so she could stand over him.

"No."

"You-You…," she stuttered, her face flushing with anger.

It was a stupid thing to do – really stupid – but Trouble grinned and said: "I thought you were tired?"

She slapped him – hard – across the cheek.

"Frond," Trouble groaned, slowly working his jaw until his magic could begin to heal the rapidly forming bruise. "I guess I really did deserve that."

"No, you didn't."

He looked up to see Holly back on the bed at his side, her teeth worrying her bottom lip. The guilty look on her face made his head spin in confusion.

"Why not?" he eventually managed to ask.

"You were only trying to help but I still managed to hurt you…"

Trouble felt something click in his mind. "Holly, look at me."

She met his eyes without resistance.

"It wasn't your fault, Holly; there was nothing you could have done to save her," he said, gauging her reaction to his words. "Vinyáya would never want you to blame yourself for her death. "

Holly tried to turn away before Trouble could see the tears gathering along her lower eyelids but he caught her chin with his left hand, holding her still. The moisture spilled over as she noticed the compassion in her superior's eyes, the tenderness of his touch.

Trouble let out a ragged breath. "I'm an idiot, aren't I?"

"Why?" Holly whispered, closing her eyes against the tears flowing down her cheeks.

"I thought you were being so hostile towards me because of how I treated Artemis but this is what you were afraid of, wasn't it?"

She nodded, no longer sure if she could speak around the lump in her throat.

"Did you think I'd see you as weak if you told me how you were really feeling?"

Trouble didn't need to see her nod to know the answer.

"Open your eyes."

Holly adamantly shook her head.

"If you want to know how I feel about this, about you, open your eyes."

She wiped the tears from her cheeks with trembling fingers, sighed and blinked her eyes open.

"Holly?" he asked, drawing her attention back to his face.

Holly's breath caught in her throat and her heart skipped a beat. Trouble – _Commander_ Trouble Kelp – had tears sparkling in his eyelashes. He blinked and one tiny drop fell onto his pale cheek, sliding slowly down until it met the curve of his jaw. Holly reached out a hesitant finger to touch the tear, sending a shiver rolling down her spine as she realised she wasn't hallucinating the little speck of water.

"You're crying," she breathed.

"I am," Trouble agreed, watching the look of astonishment on Holly's face. "So are you."

"I am. It doesn't bother you?"

"I would say no but…you did set me off…"

Holly glanced from the ghostly residue on her fingertip to the new tears in Trouble's eyes. "I made you…"

"Yeah, you did."

Trouble didn't realise Holly had moved until her lips brushed against his, her hands sliding over his shoulders to weave around the nape of his neck. He pulled her into him, onto his lap, his arms enveloping her in a gentle embrace. She placed a few soft kisses against his mouth, lingering longer with each touch, until the wet warmth of his tears against her own skin distracted her.

"You're still crying," Holly whispered against Trouble's cheek, glancing up at his partially closed eyes.

He smiled and flicked his eyes open, the long lashes grazing Holly's temple. "I won't even try to deny it."

"How refreshing," she murmured, bumping her nose against his in a gesture that was both silly and affectionate. "Why, though?"

"I don't know. I think it's a mix of sheer exhaustion, grief and happiness."

"You're crying because you're happy?" Holly asked with a frown. "Why are you happy?"

Trouble traced the frown line between her eyebrows. "Because you're okay, I think."

Holly let out an amused sigh as Trouble gave an awkward shrug of his shoulders. She shifted her awkward position on his lap, moving one knee to either side of his hips and tucked her face into the side of his neck. His scent tickled her nose and reminded her of mints and pine trees instead of the sim-coffee she'd always associated with him.

"I'm okay," Holly sighed softly, more than close enough to feel him shiver as her warm breath caressed his skin.

Trouble gently pulled her back from his shoulder so he could kiss her tenderly, grinning as her hands playfully ruffled his hair. She pulled back smiling and pushed against his chest, tipping him backwards onto the bed.

"You need to sleep." Her eyes were sparkling as she leaned over him, one hand on his chest, the other on the sheets by his shoulder. "I think there's a spare bed in the corner."

He let a mischievous growl rumble through his chest before he grabbed her by the waist and pulled her down beside him. "This bed is nicer."

"Agreed," Holly chuckled, wriggling backwards until her legs and feet were also on the bed. "I think you're a little overdressed for sleeping, Commander."

"I wonder what the IA would say if they knew you just asked your superior to take his clothes off," Trouble quipped, shrugging out of his jacket.

"Hey, not all of them!" she yelped as moved to pull his shirt off as well.

He barked a laugh and threw his shirt in the general direction he'd just thrown his jacket, moving on to his boots. "Would you squeal again if I told you I normally sleep naked?"

Holly choked and spluttered.

"You're slipping, Short," he chuckled, whipping off his belt. "I was expecting at least an ' _I don't squeal'_."

"Shut up and get in bed," Holly ordered, crawling beneath the sheets herself. "And don't even think about taking off your pants!"

Trouble considered a snappy remark 'I sleep naked, remember' but kept his silence as he slid under the blankets. Holly was not surprised when Trouble settled by her right side – they'd been on enough field missions together to know each others sleeping habits off by heart; Holly would always roll to the left and curl up on her side while Trouble usually sprawled out on his back with at least one hand on top of the blankets. However, they'd never actually _shared_ a bed which lead to an inevitable moment of awkward uncertainty which each elf filled by fidgeting and avoiding eye contact with the other.

"Frond," Holly eventually sighed, "I can remember what it felt like to be a teenager now."

"Why?"

"Well, it's…I don't know, this whole thing just suddenly felt…"

"Awkward?"

"Yeah."

Trouble caught her eyes with his and nudged her hand with his. "I understand. I'll leave now if you promise to sleep for a while – you look almost as bad as I do."

He managed to sit up and pull the blankets back before Holly hooked a finger through one of the belt loops on his pants.

"Stay," she whispered, leaning forwards to press her face against his shoulder. "Please."

The vulnerability in her voice made Trouble's heart skip a beat. "Okay; if you're sure about this, Holly."

She nodded and dragged him down to rest against the pillows. Trouble slipped his arms around her – one across her shoulder blades and one around her waist – drawing her into his strong embrace. Holly smiled against his chest before she pushed her cold nose into the V at the base of his neck where his collarbones met.

"Oi!" Trouble yelped, shivering like she'd dropped ice on his skin. "I'm not going to stay if you do _that_."

Holly pulled her head back and winced. "Sorry, it's just…Vinyáya…I don't want to be cold…."

"Oh, Holly. I was joking – really. Is that why you had the heating turned up so high?"

"I kept flashing back to the moment she died. I grabbed her hand – just before the explosion – and I saw – felt – everything. The cold was setting the memories off; looking at the seaweed tank did the same thing…"

"I'm sorr-"

"Don't," said Holly, moving her palm over Trouble's mouth to cut his words off. "I have no idea how you managed to get me to talk about…everything – after the mood I was in before – you're probably the only one who can deal with me when I get like that – but don't let that go to your head."

"I won't," he promised with a grin, pulling her back against his chest until her nose was pressing into his collarbone again.

Holly fought against the waves of exhaustion crashing against her mind. She wanted to stay awake just a little longer to watch Trouble fall asleep – a thought she would never admit aloud but she wanted to see the weight of command lift from his features as he drifted off; wanted to only see the Trouble who'd always been her friend.

Trouble shifted a little, placing a soft kiss against her temple before tucking her head back under his chin. "Sleep."

"Yes, sir," Holly sighed, letting her eyelids flutter shut; she would have to watch him sleep another day.


End file.
